wildflower5

I’ve been doing so great!  I’m getting into the swing of the exercise/ work-out thing and feeling better for it.  There’s a big hill by my house.  Its about a mile there and then 1/4 mile straight up!  (Or at least it feels that way!)  I’ve been doing that twice a day.  Its about 3 miles round trip and I’m enjoying it.

My eating has been good too, but now just as I’m doing so well, Thanksgiving has popped up and I’m a bit worried.  I’m hoping that if I can just do smaller portions and still have fun it will work best.  Hoping to squeezed in a couple of work-outs at the gym too. 

Wish me luck!

Happy Thanks giving to everybody. 

Its weighing down on me pretty bad right now.  The holidays always stress me out between the eating and the out-laws (what I call my in-laws), but this year its extra bad.  We’re doing some updating on my house - painting, new tile, new carpet and it takes alot more work than you’d think just preparing for it.  Plus, my bestfriend and I are kapoot so there goes the person who I leaned on the most.

I caught myself thinking earlier about how I’d love to just go and pick up something after work and snarf!  I’m going to try not to though and at least I have the strength right now to know its wrong.  

Can’t wait for the holiday to be over and a new year to start.  The next one has to be better!  I’m determined that it will be better.  

Ok, that may seem like too much info, but I’ve been so down on myself, for at least two months and I let everything go.  I’ve always been the type to do my hair and put on a little make-up before leaving the house, but lately I haven’t even cared.

But yesterday, I just felt better for some reason.  I went on a couple of walks, ate really well and just felt like it was time to shake the bad feelings.  I’d been down alot recent because my best friend and I are not friends anymore, but I think I’m ready to start doing better.

Oh, and I have no idea how I managed it, but I lost 4 pounds my first week here.  It must have been the walking because my eating hasn’t been very good. 

So as weird as it may seem shaving my legs just might ahve been the turning point!  

Today I feel so much more in control than I have for the past week and there’s a little glimmer of optimism in there.  I can feel it wiggling around and soon its going to pop out.

I’m going to stay ahead of the best today, which is what I call the hunger that just takes over.  My goal is to eat a couple of snacks, fruit, and drink more water.  I think it will be a good day. 

Its a really pretty day out so I’m going to go for a long walk this evening, get a little sun and just enjoy life for the day.  We’ll see what tomorrow brings. 

Ok, I started this last week, but haven’t been on since.  The truth is I’m depressed and having a hard time communicating with anyone except the food in my fridge or my cabinets. 

 My best friend and I aren’t friends any more and I’m crushed by this.  More than crushed devastated.  And I catch myself self going to food for comfort.  I’m medicating with my drug of choice, I suppose.  I’m trying to break free of this cycle and want to do something new to change my habits.  Except I’m not sure what that might be yet.

In the meantime I’m trying not to get too out of control. Wish me luck.     

I just found this site and I’m intrigued by it.  I have about 100 pounds that I want to lose.  I’m kind of a yo-yo dieter and would like to stop the cycle once and for all.  A couple of years ago I lost 80 pounds and have now gained 40 back.  Grr!  I’d love to get some of the weight off and maybe meet a friend or two. :-)  Oh, I have also never done a blog before, so if I’m doing something stupid please let me know.